Is your aspiration to be a Drug Overlord being stunted by lack of resources😢? Are you being undercut by more professional service providers😭? Perhaps you are simply looking to knock out a bit of surplus weed or ecstasy to your mates and want to show you are a fair guy👍. It doesn’t matter where you are in your meteoric slide towards becoming a dealer🤑, you need scales. Here at St Mary’s Police we have a great offer. This week we were having a spring clean at the station and came across this set of “letter scales” 😉. Free to a good home. They weigh down to the tenth of a gram which is just perfect if you fancy yourself Breaking Bad🕶.
But the offer doesn’t stop there. Oh no. Here at St Mary’s Police we just keep giving. To the person who makes the best pitch to us why they should be the main dealer this side of Lands End we will make a clean sweep of your opposition🤔.
To avail yourself of this fantastic offer just pitch up 🚶🏻at this or indeed any Police Station and let us know who your competition is; the dealer you want us to remove from circulation. Then provide us a brief resume of your own takeover business plan 🗣and a small sample of your product for assessment. In no time you could be the proud owner of this fantastic set of scales with the kudos of having Devon and Cornwall Police in marker pen on them. Trippy or what🤘.
T & C’s apply and remember New Psychoactive Substances (Legal Highs💀) become regulated this time next month, April 2016. Yes. No longer will unregistered pharmacists need to advertise them as Plant Food Not For Human Consumption. They will all be just as unlawful as the old favourites.
Sgt Colin Taylor👽